TL;DR: Honestly Compulsive is evolving into a space where I document my creative journey and what it looks like to pursue something before I feel qualified and before I know how it ends.
i really love the notion of "doing it scared". i'd say that has been the ethos of my life over the past two years. i really believe that there is a reason why certain passions or callings reoccur in our mind. especially when even in the mudane routine of life, we think about those passions. there's almost a certain air of urgency about it...and maybe, just maybe it is God or a higher power imploring to us that our "thing" is direly needed in this world to impact, inspire others, or to simply save ourselves.
for me it was my desire to learn how to DJ. when i decided to finally nurture that desire last year and take a proper DJ course, i was initially terrified becasue i truly was a novice. but it was so incredibly fulfulling and freeing to learn a skill that i always wanted to learn and also to push myself creatively in a way that i never had before. my goal wasnt to become the next kaytranada but just to immerse myself in the curriculum, nerd out, and have fun! in a metric and engagement driven society, in relation to social currency, this was an important excersize for me.
there was a moment in the end of my course where i found myself being overly critical of myself due to not knowing more techniques, comparing myself to the progress others in my cohort had made. but i had to remind myself that i quite literally knew NOTHING coming into the course, and now i have this wealth of knowledge that i didnt initially have, and that is accomplishment in itself :) its been a min since i've been on the decks, but im excited to get back at it this summer.
whether you picked up a camera for the first time today or tmrw, im looking forward to your documentary Ndidi!
Love this piece, I feel exactly the same. There are so many things I don’t start because I know how long it takes to get good at something and I hate going through the phase of not being good lol — I need to change that.
The scary thing I’m trying right now is Substack lol. I’m trying to do it full-time because the journalism industry has really burned me, and it feels silly, like being a YouTuber or something, but I’m giving it a go anyways!😂
Very excited to follow your creative journey with your doc. I do feel like people only document stuff on social once they’re sure it’s gonna work out lol I sometimes wish I would’ve documented the process of writing and publishing my book but I also don’t want folks in my business like that. I’m currently considering library school so I was thinking about sub stacking that if I decide to go
LOL at “folks in my business like that” because I totally get that too. It feels so vulnerable to share things before you know how they’re going to turn out.
But that would be so cool! One, library school is cool in itself, and two, it would give people (including me lol) a window into a career path most of us don’t really get visibility into.
I’d honestly be super curious/excited to follow that journey. If you decide to do it, please do!!
i really love the notion of "doing it scared". i'd say that has been the ethos of my life over the past two years. i really believe that there is a reason why certain passions or callings reoccur in our mind. especially when even in the mudane routine of life, we think about those passions. there's almost a certain air of urgency about it...and maybe, just maybe it is God or a higher power imploring to us that our "thing" is direly needed in this world to impact, inspire others, or to simply save ourselves.
for me it was my desire to learn how to DJ. when i decided to finally nurture that desire last year and take a proper DJ course, i was initially terrified becasue i truly was a novice. but it was so incredibly fulfulling and freeing to learn a skill that i always wanted to learn and also to push myself creatively in a way that i never had before. my goal wasnt to become the next kaytranada but just to immerse myself in the curriculum, nerd out, and have fun! in a metric and engagement driven society, in relation to social currency, this was an important excersize for me.
there was a moment in the end of my course where i found myself being overly critical of myself due to not knowing more techniques, comparing myself to the progress others in my cohort had made. but i had to remind myself that i quite literally knew NOTHING coming into the course, and now i have this wealth of knowledge that i didnt initially have, and that is accomplishment in itself :) its been a min since i've been on the decks, but im excited to get back at it this summer.
whether you picked up a camera for the first time today or tmrw, im looking forward to your documentary Ndidi!
Love this piece, I feel exactly the same. There are so many things I don’t start because I know how long it takes to get good at something and I hate going through the phase of not being good lol — I need to change that.
The scary thing I’m trying right now is Substack lol. I’m trying to do it full-time because the journalism industry has really burned me, and it feels silly, like being a YouTuber or something, but I’m giving it a go anyways!😂
Yes!! Same here. I think I’ve avoided so many things just because I didn’t want to go through the awkward “beginner” phase lol.
Love that you’re doing the scary thing anyway. But you’re genuinely SO good at it! Yours is truly one of my favorite Substacks out there.
😁❤️
Very excited to follow your creative journey with your doc. I do feel like people only document stuff on social once they’re sure it’s gonna work out lol I sometimes wish I would’ve documented the process of writing and publishing my book but I also don’t want folks in my business like that. I’m currently considering library school so I was thinking about sub stacking that if I decide to go
LOL at “folks in my business like that” because I totally get that too. It feels so vulnerable to share things before you know how they’re going to turn out.
But that would be so cool! One, library school is cool in itself, and two, it would give people (including me lol) a window into a career path most of us don’t really get visibility into.
I’d honestly be super curious/excited to follow that journey. If you decide to do it, please do!!